What is the #1 reason of divorce in the US?
It all depends on whom you’re asking.
Rankings will differ from various studies, but one of the main reasons for divorces consistently centers around issues dealing with money.
Reason #1 for Divorce: Money
Money matters can make married couples crazy because money touches so many parts of everyone’s lives.
It doesn’t matter if you have a ton of money or not, there’s always the matter of money as a primary bond in marriage. Meaning it’s also a primary tinderbox for disputes and in some cases, a determining factor for divorce.
Money matters can wreak havoc on a marriage in so many various ways.
Spouses that are irresponsible with their credit cards can run up huge amounts of debts without the other spouse knowing. One spouse may earn significantly more than the spouse, developing earning/ power issues.
Spouses might have different outlooks on long term financial objectives. One spouse may want to “live for the now” whereas the other wants to place every extra penny into retirement.
One spouse may want a new car every 2 years whereas the other is content to drive anything that is paid off.
Reason #2 for Divorce: Lack of Intimacy
As time passes, marriages tend to be less about physical contact and more about evolution into a deeper and more spiritual type of love. That is typical. Sex is still an important part of each marriage each step along the way, however, intimacy is also a lot more than simply sex.
Newsweek magazine has estimated 15% to 20% of spouses are in a relationship devoid of sex. Research shows that 10% or less of married couples below the age of 50 haven’t had sex in the previous year. Additionally, less than 20% have reported having sex a couple of times a year, or possibly monthly, under the age of 40.
Reason #3 for Divorce: Unfaithfulness
Cheating spouses are a pretty clear-cut reason why married couples get divorced. But strangely, a lot of married couples have handled infidelity issues and discovered a way to stay married.
This does not mean you should take your chances if you’re thinking about straying outside the marriage.
The fact remains infidelity essentially alters your marriage. It diminishes trust and leads to a communication breakdown.
Eventually, infidelity typically catches up with you making it is one of the major causes for divorce.
Reason #4 for Divorce: Physical or Mental Abuse
When there’s a history of domestic abuse in a marriage, that is absolutely a justifiable reason to step away from the marriage.
A lot of people believe that abuse is limited to physical, however emotional and financial abuse are also not uncommon. Screaming, disregard, continual signs of anger, concealing money, crude comments, and other displays of negativity are just as damaging.
Abuse isn’t only aimed at a spouse, either. Children, friends, family, or other individuals that reside in the same home can be targeted for abuse also. Threatening their wellbeing is just as alarming as any threats made to a spouse.
Reason #5 for Divorce: Lack Of Compatibility
When you first got married, you were positive your spouse was the person you want to spend your life with. Everything was there.
Things that annoyed you were minor, and you simply waved it off since you were in love. You disregarded faults, differences of view, and interests. Those were the things you would “work on” together after you said your “I do’s.”
But even though if your marriage began in total bliss and harmonious, time changes everything.
Reason #6 for Divorce: Physical Appearance
Drifting apart in your marriage because of physical changes in you or your spouse’s appearance may sound frivolous, superficial, and discriminatory. But it is a real cause for couples getting divorced.
Men and women desire attractive partners, and if one or the other gains a considerable amount of weight, it can be a total turnoff.
The other way around, if one spouse loses a bunch of weight, it could also have drastic changes in the relationship. A spouse could become more attractive to other people, maybe for the very first time.
Changes in physical appearance could have an effect on your intimacy levels, self-esteem, and many other facets of your life, your health included. This can also develop a separate set of challenges in the marriage, also.
Reason #7 for Divorce: Addiction
When thinking of addictions, most likely you think of drug or alcohol addictions.
However, addictions come in a lot of forms. All of them being a threat to the marriage surviving.
When spouses start to grow apart, they might turn to other addictions like porn, gambling, spending uncontrollably, or sex. An addiction takes control of a person’s life and puts them at the risk of losing their job, friends, family, and marriage.
Reason #8 for Divorce: Getting Married Too Young
Another big reason spouses cite for getting divorced is not being fully ready for what marriage entails.
Divorce rates are the highest for spouses in their 20s, and just about half of all divorces take place inside of the first ten years.
Marrying at a young age can cause divorce for a lot of reasons…
Couples that get married at a young age are potentially likely to encounter more money issues because their careers have not been established. In many cases, they haven’t matured and aren’t able to communicate effectively. Without experience as a guide, a lack of maturity will typically overtake a milder approach to marital issues.
Reason #9 for Divorce: Getting Married for The Wrong Reasons
Many couples that get married have irrational expectations about what marriage needs be about, and they end up utterly disappointed when their fairy tale ends with reality.
Living happily-ever-after needs continual work. But there’s a distinction between putting in the work and putting pressure on your spouse to make the marriage everything it can be. If there’s a persistent tension between you, eventually, fractures in the relationship will develop, and your marriage will break down in an instant.
Reason #10 for Divorce: Lack of Communication
When you can’t communicate any longer with your spouse constructively, the marriage might be in trouble.
Communication can fail when you get too wrapped up in all the facets of your life. The children, your job, activities, family relationships, your emotional health, your community standing, and more sucks time out of your day and the life out of the relationship with your better half.
Occasionally, you go on auto and make presumptions regarding communication. That is just as risky. You’re setting yourself up for a bunch of resentment, disappointment, anger, and more that will bubble over into every part of your married life.
Reason #11 for Divorce: Lack Of Equality And Identity
If you get married to a person that has a powerful personality, it is simple to subjugate yourself regarding making critical decisions.
An ideal marriage needs to have open communication and compromise with flexibility so that each party feels they have a significant stake in the marriage.
Being in a marriage doesn’t always mean being with each other. You can smother a marriage if you don’t give it the time and space that it needs to grow.
Crowley, Jason. “11 Most Common Reasons for Divorce.” Survive Divorce, 26 Jan. 2020, www.survivedivorce.com/common-reasons-for-divorce.
Choose the Right Divorce Lawyer in Arizona
Regardless of the choice you make, it’s important you make the best choice for you when hiring a divorce attorney. Remember: The decisions you make now can affect your future. Ultimately, choosing the best lawyer will depend on which lawyer feels best for you and your situation.